Rule of law? Listen, darling, if you’re old enough to drink, you’re old enough to understand this. The rich got rich by stealing the land from the people. 1066 and all that, you know. Then we had to protect our wealth from the people.
So we implemented a legal system with extremely harsh punishments for theft or insurrection. That’s what the law’s for – to protect us, the rich.
We created a powerful thing, not so easy to control. Of course it protects the poor as well now, doesn’t it. To carry on protecting us in these ‘democratic’ times, the law must be seen to serve everybody. The people know the truth, kind of, but for the sake of a quiet life they go along with it.
Some of us got super-rich. We’re above the law. Sure, there has to be a sacrifice every now and then. One of us gets tossed on the bonfire, for the sake of appearances. But apart from that, we’re functionally above the law.
Down there, the degree of inequity is such that law and order is needed to prevent unrest. Shall I use a metaphor, dear? If the pit props of the law break, the goldmine of civil contentment will collapse. That’s not good for us. The people would be ruled by gangsters, and we’d have to find another way.
The people could run things themselves, of course, and share out the wealth – but how would they overcome the gangster warlords that would take over? That’s why they go along with our law – the alternative’s too scary! They’re basically sheep, Darling – and we’re the big, bad wolves!
You know, dear, people in poor countries – not having the judicial superstructure and public service integrity they’d need for effective law – would love our western law and order. No more extortion by gangsters, or the corrupt secret police knocking on your door in the middle of the night.
So we’re the founders of the law, Darling, but these days, it has to keep us at arm’s length. It serves us all, rich and poor alike. Simply delightful!
Democracy suits us. We don’t have to lift a finger, apart from the occasional meeting or intervention. The system practically runs itself, on bread and circuses. And thanks to the offshore magic, we don’t even have to pay for it! Marvellous!
The state’s a wonderful thing, darling. It does everything for the people, so they don’t have to care. They just pay taxes. It makes them selfish and spiritless. They don’t think about inequity – or about us.
And since our 80s neolib intervention – you know, privatisation, deregulation, and so on – they pay us to run it! It’s perfect!
‘Lobby’ – it’s a strange word, isn’t it. But that’s how we run things. We ‘lobby’ the politicians and they do what we say. Some protesters call it corruption, but repressive tolerance keeps them quiet, bless them.
Watch the drinking, and it’s a wonderful life. I know, we can’t buy immortality yet. That’s why we’re crowd-funding that project, isn’t it.
Climate crisis? Yes, it’s a thing, sweetie. Why are we funding the deniers? It’s a habit, isn’t it. It’s crises that make us richer and more powerful. It goes critical, we could be fucked, true. But if we ride it out – it’s the mother lode!
There was Peter Thiel’s New Zealand thing, of course. You know – PayPal founder, Trump nutter? You can’t buy a democracy off – well, not like that. But it was a useful distraction, wasn’t it.
Trump? yes, he and most of his supporters, like Thiel are nutters: psychopaths and narcissists. But he’s good for us – he’s one of us! Ramping up crisis. privatising security – it’s all good!
As for climate refuge, there’s Putin’s stealth enclave in Fuckistan, wherever. You know? Self-sufficient food, water, energy, security. Luxury, as per. Shangri-fucking-La. Entry, a billion per family, a million a head per year til it blows over.
He’s another psycho, so it’s a bit risky. But basically he’s one of us – the richest of us all, dear. And when it’s over, the world – what’s left of it – is ours. Well, yours, probably. New laws. New order!
Little more Dom, darling?
soothfairy 